Yummy Life

I’ve been so busy that I can barely think lately!  But I did want to take some time this week to reflect and react to the feelings that have been boiling up inside of me.  I’m sure that some of you will be able to relate to how I’ve been feeling.

I recently celebrated my 35th birthday.  I was already infertile, but now I am “old” and infertile.  Or am I?  Is age and the state of my eggs merely a state of mind?  I’ve been so afraid to face my fears surrounding my fertility.  I want another child, there is no doubt about that.  I wanted that yesterday (or a year ago).  But when I think of having a biological child, many fears suddenly appear.  Did I wait too long?  Are my eggs any good?  Will my weight prevent me from conceiving?  What if I did get pregnant – would I have a healthy pregnancy?  What if my baby turned out to be “abnormal” somehow?  Oh, and there are the fears surrounding IVF.  What if it doesn’t work?  What if it works too well and I end up with triplets or more?  What if I am too emotional and bitchy to deal with my daily life while I am going through it?  What if I am too emotionally fragile to handle it?

I am deciding to be brave today.  I am making major strides in preparing for my future, which WILL include another child.  I am letting go of trying to control what I can’t, and am taking charge of what I can.  I am taking a deep breath in, and when I breathe out, the fears will go with it.  I am making two very important phone calls today.  I am taking action!  No matter what sort of news I may receive in the future, I am deciding TODAY that I am not going to let that news stand between me and the baby that I long to hold.

I saw a little boy in the mall the other day, and he looked right into my eyes and smiled as if to convey some sort of message to me.  He looked a bit like what I imagine my biological son would look like.  Thinking about him brings tears to my eyes.  I’ve decided to incorporate him into my imagery as I feel that this is very powerful.

Studies have shown that infertility is not just a physical issue.  Mental and emotional components play a definite role in conception.  Feelings, emotions, fears, frustrations, anxieties, and stressors are all major factors in this complicated process – it’s important to acknowledge this.  It’s also important to have unyielding support and guidance during this time.

I have many simple tools that I would love to share with you so that you can unleash the fertile goddess that lives within you.  Since these tools are very powerful, it’s important to have a support system in place. That is what the Fertile Attraction program will provide – support from many angles combined with a powerful coaching program unlike no other.  Registration will open next week and I’ll be spreading the news about a free information call that will answer all your questions.

Please shoot me an email at holly@yummylifecoaching.com if you have any questions.

I’m off to make some phone calls…

Holly

I  just want to ride your motor-sickle! 

My mother always used to say that.  Later on it kind of became my mantra. Even as a newlywed, I didn’t have a normal sexual appetite.  I always attributed it to body image issues, which definitely played a part in it.  But there was more to the story.  Frequent infections, PCOS and then infertility definitely did NOT make things any better.  Something that kept running through my head suddenly stood out:  ”I’m not a real woman”.  Real women, after all, were feminine, not adorned with chin hairs and a mustache.  Real women had curves, not rolls that would not even turn on the Pillsbury Dough Boy.  Once we began the infertility journey, things took a real turn for the worse.  I COULD NOT BEAR CHILDREN, the one thing that defines womanhood in my opinion. What is the point of having sex?  Sex, after all, is for babymaking, and that was not going to happen “the old-fashioned way”. 

The one thing I can tell you is that my attitude toward sex, and the dry spells that have accompanied my 10-year marriage, have not been good for the relationship.  I’ve read countless books, been to therapists, and bought sex toys.  But there was a secret to learning to enjoy tickling the pickle once again.  

Maintaining a good relationship with your partner is so important, especially if you are battling PCOS or having trouble conceiving.  These things can destroy relationships if you are not careful.  This topic will definitely be discussed in my upcoming fertility coaching program.  IT IS SO IMPORTANT.  Men think differently about sex than women do, and it’s crucial to understand this and make some concessions in the bedroom.  

The number one thing standing in your way of having a better relationship is YOU.  Yes, you have challenges.  You may even have very good reasons for not wanting to be intimate.  The good news is that you hold the power,and things can definitely change for you.  But the good sex fairy does not exist ladies, so you will need to give a little attention to the magic wand and make your own happily ever after.  

Yes, I know, you just don’t feel like it. TOO BAD!  Do you want things to be better?  Come and find out some tips for learning to like sex again at my FREE info call on Tuesday, April 20, at 9:30 pm.  Take the Tickle the Pickle Challenge!  Click here for details…

WARNING:  I am likely to touch a couple of nerves, so be prepared.  I’ve faced the ugly truth, and so can you.  This topic requires some firm coaching, and what kind of coach would I be if I couldn’t be honest with you?  

I hope to “see” you on the call!  

Holly

Yes, I have seen them. Overweight women boasting even bigger bellies due to pregnancy. I’m not sure if it should give me hope or whether I should be afraid for these women who may be experiencing complications in their pregnancies. I wonder if they had to do fertility treatments or if it happened naturally.

Since I have been contraceptive-free for the last 10 years and have yet to experience the miracle of pregnancy, I am thinking that being fat just isn’t working for me. I’ve been overweight for the last 10 years, but I have not been close to my “fertile weight”. It’s the one thing I haven’t tried yet! I’ve been striving to get healthy and improve my PCOS symptoms, losing over 30 lbs in the last year, but I am still not close to my “fertile weight”.

I am happy to know that my fertile weight is actually higher than my actual “ideal” weight. I can still be a little chunky and have a baby – woo hoo! The American Society for Reproductive Medicine (ASRM) suggests that as little as a 10 percent decrease in weight can have a profound difference on a woman’s ability to conceive. According to this, I am already more fertile than I was before – great news!

The ASRM asserts that more than 70 percent of women who are infertile as a result of body weight disorders will conceive spontaneously if their weight is corrected through either weight loss or weight gain. WOW! Shouldn’t this be a wake up call?

Releasing weight is not the easiest thing to do. There are a million different diets and approaches to losing fat, so how do we know if we are doing the right thing? Getting down to a BMI of around 25 can put you in the “fertile weight” category, but it is important to follow a diet that supports fertility. What exactly is that?

I am conducting a FREE call on the topic of “Demystifying the Fertility Diet” on April 1, 2010 at 8:30 pm. I’ll present some of the latest results of research and let you decide if you are doing enough to support your own fertility. As always, a special bonus to anyone who joins me live on the call!

http://www.yummylifecoaching.com/Teleclasses.html

I hope to “see” you on the call!

Holly

I have just begun my new free teleclass on enhancing fertility naturally.  The first call was last night.  My biggest fear is always something going wrong technically, and something always does, so I think I am manifesting this bad luck.  I’ll have to do some meditation next week!  I got cut off in the beginning and got back on the line, and the replay doesn’t work  The back up recording does, however, so I can still give everyone the recording as promised – you’ll just need to forward through the first 20 minutes or so to get to the part where I’m talking.  I WILL figure this out or use a different teleconferencing service!  No one wanted to interact on the call, which would have made it more interesting, but once it got started all was good.

I shared a couple of techniques on the call.  This call is a preview to my 12-week Fertile Attraction group coaching program that starts in May.  There will be so many more things to learn in the program, this was just a snippet.  I would LOVE some feedback – so please listen to the recording if you weren’t on the call and reply to this post.  Was this a pertinent topic?  What did you think of the exercises?  What sort of things would you like to see covered in the 12-week program?  Fertile Attraction is a sort of support group with a learning element – we’ll lift each other up and learn techniques for staying positive and possibly even increasing our chances of becoming pregnant.

Here is the recording – you can listen on your computer or download to listen to it on your mp3 player:

http://events.nfinite.com/13412366675402.mp3

I’ll be giving away 2 great FertilAid products – FertilAid for Women and FertilAid for Men- yes, 2 winners of the giveaway!  All you need to do is make a comment on this post.  But wait, there’s more (cue the infomercial) – if you become a fan on my Facebook page or if you become my friend on Facebook you’ll get bonus entries.  You can also follow me on Twitter for another bonus entry opportunity.  Good luck everyone!

Next week’s call will be on Tuesday at 9 pm and will be entitled “Demystifying the Fertility Diet”.  Hope to see you on the call!

Holly

I’m sure I’m going to offend some people by saying this – but if you stop overeating, you can afford to eat healthy.  I am a bona fide binge eater, so I have personal experience with this.

Overeating is expensive.  A half gallon of ice cream costs between $5-$7, depending on whether or not it’s on sale.  If you eat that all in one or two sittings, that is a pretty expensive serving.  The same goes with other foods that are easy to inhale like chips, dips, cakes, etc.

Most people do not binge on fruits, vegetables, or lean meats.  It’s pretty easy to keep servings of these things in check.  There are a lot of healthy packaged foods, and they do tend to cost more than their less expensive counterparts.  They become a lot more expensive if you eat more than one serving at a time.  Cereal is one product that comes to mind when I think of distorted serving size.  A serving size is usually 3/4 of a cup, and there are supposed to be around 13 servings in a box.  Wow, a normal $5 box of cereal could last almost two weeks!  The same goes with crackers and other snack-type foods.  Inhaling foods not only is bad for your waistline, it’s hard on your wallet as well!

You probably have your favorite places to shop for food.  You may not have even entertained the idea of checking out the prices at other stores to compare.  You should, because you may be missing out on some deals!

A pepper is a pepper, right?  Shouldn’t it cost the same at every store?  Since different stores get their produce from different places, the prices can vary quite a bit.  It’s important to take a look at quality and the difference between conventional and organic, local or shipped from afar.  If you live in a colder climate, in the wintertime you may not have as many choices when it comes to buying fresh, high quality produce, but you can still be a savvy shopper.

Look for Sales and Specials

Most stores do have specials on certain produce, you just need to be a mindful shopper.  The apples displayed next to one another may be priced very differently.  If you are not too picky, buy the ones that are on sale.  The cost between organic and conventional may not be worth the price difference, depending on the quality of what is available.  If what you are looking to buy is not one of the Dirty Dozen, you may want to buy the less expensive version and clean it thoroughly when you get home.  Some stores definitely offer better deals on their fruits and veggies, so shop around to get familiar with who has the best quality produce at a good price.

Sharpen Your Knives

Life today is all about convenience and fast living.  If you are trying to stick to a budget and still want to include plenty of healthy fresh produce in your diet, forego convenience and get ready to peel and chop in your own kitchen.  Grocery stores offer many pre-packaged, already chopped up fruits and vegetables so that you can prepare them in a hurry and get on with your life.  Some of these items come in plastic packaging from the manufacturer, and some come wrapped by the grocery store.  Either way, you are still paying for packaging and creating more waste and you are spending more money for the convenience.  It really doesn’t take that long to chop up an onion, melon or sweet potato.  Reduce your exposure to plastics, save the earth, and get chopping.  Your wallet will thank you!

Try Out a New Store

We all have our comfort zones, but sometimes it is very cost effective to step out of yours and explore new territory.  Chances are you have some wonderful stores near you that you do not even know about.  I have a small, locally owned market by my house that has wonderful produce, many of it local.  And it costs less than at the local warehouse store of superstore where I do the bulk of my shopping.  Of of my favorite things to do is to venture into the local Asian and Hispanic supermarkets.  They have things that many people have never heard of, and because they do not spend millions of dollars on advertising each year, they are able to pass the cost savings on to their customers.

Consider Shopping Locally

In addition to trying out some locally owned markets, consider taking advantage of what the local farms in your area have to offer.  The produce is fresh since it doesn’t travel from afar, you are keeping the money in your local economy, and you can actually talk to the people who grow your food!  Sometimes the produce is less expensive that a grocery store, sometimes not, but once again it’s important to ask “what am I actually paying for?”  Are you paying for fuel to get the produce to your local market, creating pollution and wasting natural resources?  Much of the time the local wares are much less expensive and you get more for your money.  Each summer I love to visit my local farmer’s markets and love coming back with several huge bags of tasty goods for about about $25.  Since the food tastes good, it actually gets eaten, saving me money!  I love stopping at little roadside stands too.

Many areas also offer farm shares and co-ops that allow you to get fresh, local goods each week.  The up front price may seem a little steep, but when you divide the price you pay on average each week and consider that most of the time this produce is organic, it really is worth it most of the time.

Grow Your Own

Got a green thumb?  Why not try growing some of your own fruits and vegetables?  I tried this last year, despite knowing that I have the blackest thumb in the midwest, and it did not turn out so well.  However, to be fair, we just kind of threw stuff in the ground without researching what grows best in our local soil and reading up on how to prepare a garden bed.  We are going to do our research and try again this year.  You can get your very own organic produce for a fraction of the cost of what you would pay for in a store.  You may even grow so much that you have to give it away to your friends.  It takes a little bit of work on your part (OK, a lot, but some people find it to be fun) but if you really want to know where your food comes from, this is the way to go.

I love buying fresh produce.  It almost feels like a runner’s high to me.  I really find that if I feel good about what I am buying, it makes a difference in how I eat and cook.  Tap into what makes you feel good and make every dollar count!

Manufacturers rely on pretty packages to sell their products.  Think about what you end up doing with that pretty package once you eat what is inside:  throw it away or recycle it.  Chances are that you have paid for many, many packages over the course of your life and you could have saved thousands of dollars if you had bought the “uglier” product.  Perhaps you aren’t aware of the uglies.  They exist!  You may have to search for them a bit, but you can find them and you can save a ton of money.  Some products that come “ugly”:

Oatmeal

Quinoa

Rice

Nuts

Beans

Lentils

Coconut

Flour

I buy a lot of products in bulk from a local health food store.  Many things at this store are more expensive than at other stores, but this store sells many items in bulk, that are packaged in a clear plastic bag with a label slapped on it, that are much cheaper than their counterparts in pretty packages.  They are organic products, such as organically grown oats and garbanzo beans for hummus.  I can buy a lot more product for a lot less money.  A large back of quinoa costs about $3.0o when purchased in the ugly package and is $2-$3 more expensive for a smaller, more “decorated” package.  It is the same product.  I can get several meals out of the larger bag of quinoa, where the smaller one may last about 2 meals.  This is a no brainer!

Also, take note that most junk food comes in attractive packaging.  So many people think that foods that are bad for you are less expensive.  Sometimes, maybe, but think of what you are ACTUALLY paying for.  Take for instance sugared cereals.  They come in bright colored packages, in a box that looks like it’s a decent size.  This box of cereal is around $4.20.  You open up the box, and there is a bag inside.  There is a lot of room in this box.  You are paying mostly for air and the pretty box. When you buy oatmeal in bulk, you are buying oats.  When you buy fresh fruit, you are buying fruit.

What would you rather pay for?

I hear a lot of excuses for not eating healthier.  Having a crazy, hectic schedule comes in a close second, but the number one excuse that I hear for not eating a healthier diet is “Healthy food is too expensive”.

Over the next few posts, I am going to explore how to live healthy on a budget.  I am even going to host a complimentary teleseminar on how to eat healthy on a budget.  I have been living on a shoestring budget for a long time and I have picked up many tips and tricks along the way.  I have also made some realizations about the food that is available in grocery stores.  Of course, there are always trade offs, so in order to eat a bit healthier you may have to spend more time making lists, going to different stores, and reading labels.  It can be done – plus, the money you will spend on healthier food is nothing compared to the money you will shell out if you become sick and decrepit.  And have you ever stopped to ponder the question “what am I really paying for?” when you consider buying packaged, processed foods?

I know you are anxious to hear some ways that you can save some money on healthy foods, so I have a tip to share with you today. STOP WASTING FOOD! If you’ve ever bought a bunch of fruit and vegetables and watched them rot in your refrigerator, you know what I’m talking about.  This is literally money thrown in the garbage.  Try shopping like a European – buy just enough for a day or two and do not buy more until you eat what you have.  Don’t buy something just because it’s good for you.  If you do not like something, you won’t eat it, and your money will be wasted.  If you want to enjoy your healthy life, the way to do that is not choking down foods that you think are nasty.  You may also consider buying frozen fruit and vegetables if you find yourself wasting a little too much.

If your food is starting to turn a bit and is no long aesthetically pleasing but still edible, throw it in a soup or smoothie.  The food gets used, and your money does not go to waste!

Tomorrow’s Tip:  Don’t pay for packaging!

Eat up!

It seems like just yesterday I was graduating from college with all of these hopeful dreams that I would someday have a great career, a wonderful family and many, many people would know my name.  Thirteen years later I look back and all I can ask myself is “Where did the time go?”  It seems like since I have been “grown up” time has really started to fly by.  I can remember being young and stuck inside on a rainy day with nothing to do.  Time passed so SLOWLY.  Now, even on rainy, boring days, the time passes much too quickly.

Yes, I have gotten older.  I do all of the things that “adults” do.  But there is still a little girl inside me that longs to have fun and be free.  She throws fits when she doesn’t get her way.  She is happy with the simple things in life and doesn’t think too much about the future.  She is shoved into the background most every day because, darn it, life gets in the way.  My adult life.  The one I am always not so happy with.  The one that has been difficult, heartbreaking, roller-coaster like, and yes, sometimes disappointing.  I hate looking back on my life and seeing the huge gap of where I thought I “should” be and where I stand today.  I do believe that everything in life has a purpose; everything happens for a reason.  I regret doing a lot of things, but most of all I regret the things that I did not do.  The things I did not do because I was afraid.  Or too shy to do.  Or too damn lazy.  Because time has gone by really quickly and it serves as a constant reminder that  we do not live forever, and once time has passed we cannot get it back.  I regret living much of my life in an apathetic state, not caring enough about myself or what happened to me to take action and make a better life.

I don’t know how much longer I will be on this earth.  I would like to stop living my life in fear and do things even though they scare me.  I no longer wish to wander through the forest of my life feeling numb to the pricks of the thorns that symbolize excitement, change and love.  I want to really FEEL what is going on, even if it is not all that pleasant.  I’ve always felt that one day my words would tell a fantastic story yet how can I tell this story if I go through life experiencing nothing?  I want to be raw; exposed.  I want to be wounded so that I can heal and be proud of the scar that is left behind.  I want to inspire others to inspire others not to WASTE their lives away.

Life does not always deal us a fair hand.  But today I am choosing to harbor no ill will toward others who appear to be more “blessed” than I am.  Despite all of the bad times, teardrops shed, heartbreaking disappointment and longing for something “more” there have been some high points along the way as well.  We control the future so much more than we realize.  We can change the way we think about our lives, even if we can’t control what happens in them all of the time.

I think tomorrow is going to be a fun, productive and joy-filled day.  One day at a time – one affirmation at a time.  I can’t believe that I am grown up already!  But that doesn’t mean that I always have to think like a grown up.  The little girl inside me can live on and not think too much about the future and things that she cannot control.  She can be happy that she is alive and that she has everything she needs for this single moment.  And she can be excited about the small stuff like Cool Whip on warm apples and a vacation to Walt Disney World.

The only thing we can be sure of is that time is going to pass much too quickly.  Are you making the most of today?  How are you planning on spending tomorrow?

I hear a lot of people say “when I lose weight” or “after I am skinny”.  They say this in relation to things they will do, or how they will feel (especially when it comes to feeling beautiful or being happy).  Do you know how many people say that over and over again and yet they never get to the point where they are “skinny”?  Have you ever thought that the two may be related?

You bet they are related.  If you do not love and respect yourself, you will not treat yourself the way you need to be treated.  You will not feel that you deserve to be healthy or beautiful.  You will continue to stand in your own way; you will sabotage your own efforts.  You will not believe that you can change.  You will not be able to see a better future for yourself or visualize yourself as a healthy, happy woman.  Have you ever received a compliment and then went out and eaten a half gallon of ice cream?  Have you ever wondered WHY you do that?

The worst thing about this is that it is a vicious cycle.  You do not feel beautiful, confident or happy and you feel you need to do something about it.  But because you do not like yourself very much you have a hard time getting the motivation to make positive changes.  Or if you do, you sabotage yourself.  Then, because you “failed”, you hate yourself even more.  Wouldn’t a more logical first step be to learn to love and respect yourself just a little bit more?

I know, it’s easier said than done.  I have been there.  I have been to the very bottom of the pit of self-despair.  I truly believe that I hated myself. And because I despised nearly everything about myself, I found that everything that I did was done in order to make myself feel better about who I was.  I put off doing things, including things that would have made a positive impact on my health and happiness, because I “needed to lose weight”.  Who says only “skinny” people should wear lingerie or go skinny dipping? Or go hiking in the woods on a hot day?  Or get a much needed makeover?  And who the hell says that you don’t deserve love and respect just because you carry some extra weight?

You do not need to wait to be “beautiful”.  You ARE beautiful.  If you need to work a little to make yourself feel better, DO IT.  You deserve it – pamper yourself a little!  If a haircut and a little make up or a new outfit lift your spirits, then treat yourself.  And remember how you feel afterward.  This is the feeling that will carry you forward, that will propel you in a positive direction.  You need to eat healthy and incorporate activity into your schedule because you DESERVE it.

If you do not love or respect yourself as much as you should, and it is standing in the way of your health and happiness, I challenge you to do something about it.  You need to believe that you do great things, that you can change your life in a big way.  You need to be honest with yourself about where you stand today so you know in which direction you should venture.  You need to take action NOW rather than later.  And it always helps to have some support along the way.

I want to invite you to a FREE information call about RESOLVE:  4 Weeks to a Healthier You!  I’ll be giving you some tips on how you can ease into a healthier lifestyle by not only taking some positive action steps and making realistic goals but by changing your mindset.  Learning to change the way you think about yourself is the most powerful tool to getting a leaner, healthier body.

RESOLVE – 4 Weeks to a Healthier You!

FREE INFORMATION CALL

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

9 pm EST

REGISTER FOR THE CALL

It’s time to be beautiful.  Not “when you lose weight” or “1 year from now” or whenever you expect to reach your goals.  The time is now.  You are beautiful and strong and you know what you want – what you DESERVE.  It doesn’t matter how long you have looked the way you do now or what health problems you may be experiencing.  If you put off being beautiful, you put off living your life.  You are wasting precious moments that you will never get back.

There will be some time-sensitive information shared on the call – you don’t want to miss it!  If you can’t make the call, don’t worry – the call will be recorded and you will still be able to take advantage of the special bonuses shared on the call.

I look forward to seeing you on the call!

Holly